Mortality

Well, it's been determined...

I'm MORTAL!

I was talking to Keri on the phone on Wednesday afternoon, (4:40 to be exact) and all of a sudden, I couldn't talk! The words were in my head, I could see 'em on my whiteboard, but I couldn't get my mouth to make them! Keri said I was saying weird words and just kind of stuttering. I knew something was wrong and I started to panic. I called to Stan, (at that point who knows WHAT I called him, but anyhoo...) and Keri was practically yelling at me, "Go to the doctor or hospital NOW!"

So we did!

We went to Insta-care first. When the nurse asked my phone number, I freakin' couldn't remember it! Couldn't remember the date, either. Weirdest, scariest thing ever! They sent us to the hospital. They wanted to call the ambulance, but I said no.

It's ridiculous, I know, but the first thought that ran through my head was, "NO body will be carrying this body anywhere today!"

After being there four hours or so, it was determined that I either had a mini-stroke, or a migraine.

Very definitive.

I feel like it was a migraine, cuz I still have a headache. I hope like all blasphemy it doesn't happen again, I'll tell ya what!

Doc told me that almost every person has had at least two or three mini-strokes by the time they turn 60; they just don't recognize them.

FUNNY NEWS MINUTE:

Probably because I was scared out of my mind, my bladder decided it needed to empty about every fifteen minutes. SERIOUSLY! Then, when they did the CAT scan, he put a dye in me. There I am, lying on this hard, cold table, feeling like if he didn't hurry...well, you know! He FAILED to tell me that this dye would make me feel warm all of a sudden. I was thinking to myself, "DEB, for cryin' out loud, you are 55 years old and you JUST PEED YOUR PANTS!" I didn't really, it just totally felt like it! WHEW! I knew I was clenching!

GOOD NEWS MINUTE:

I had and have SO much support! Of course, Stan was with me, and he and Tyler gave me a MARVELOUS blessing, and both Keri and Tyler came right to the hospital with their families, including the kids! And I wanted them ALL in the room with me, and the hospital was okay with it. I could feel the love my family have for each other, the real, true, gotcher-back kinda love, ya know? Both my children held on to me, literally, and boy, could I feel it!

BAD NEWS MINUTE:

Preston was waiting outside for Keri to get there. A woman pulled up in her car and said her husband was in the back and needed help. He was unresponsive, and the three nurses were having a hard time getting him out. Preston jumped right in to help get him out and onto the gurney. He could tell the little grampa was in trouble.

They wheeled him into the same room I was in with only a curtain separating us. One guy was on top doing CPR and people were scrambling everywhere. Poor little gramma just stood there, all alone, watching her husband die. I wanted to go to her, hold her, comfort her. They called his death, then took her to his side and left the room.

Three feet away from me, in total silence,

I listened to this sister mourn her loss.

Thereby was my own mortality thrown in my face.